Let me just start off by saying how challenging it is to take your mom friendship to the next level; it really is like dating. "Is she okay with me feeding my kid this?" "Can we go out for drinks after we put our kids to bed or are you only worthy of a park playdate?" "Are you going to judge me for the mess level in my house right now?"
As a new stay-at-home mother of twin girls, I knew that I needed people that would relate to what I was going through. I went online to find mom groups, and I swear it felt like I was on dating sites - location, age of children, interests, etc. Holy cow! Why did it feel so complicated and why was it so hard to find someone for my kids to play with? I hit up places where I knew other parents would take their children, and I kept seeing familiar faces at parks and play areas that I frequented. I literally forced myself to meet new moms with children similar to my girls' age. I found myself struggling with the anxiety of whether or not I was "cool enough" or "mom enough" to hang with other moms.
After a while, I forced myself to make the effort to go to playdates and events hosted by Gemini Crickets members. I even found myself starting to invite others to playdates I had scheduled on the calendar. Man, it really was like dating other people; I even took the time to do my makeup (Well, that was short lived, hah!).
In the whirlwind of it all, I met moms who weren't going to judge me if I wore the same thing as yesterday. I found moms who didn't care if I looked like I hadn't showered in a week. I friended moms who had piles of unwashed dishes in their sink. I confided in the ups and downs of motherhood with these women. These women were in the trenches of motherhood with me.
But, in the craziness of it all, they also got to experience some exciting milestones with me. These women watched my kids during the first few days of learning how to walk. These moms listened to my kids babble their first sentences. They also witnessed the joys of conquering potty training.
To be quite honest, I'm not sure how I would have gotten through these first few years without them. In essence, I just wanted to give a shout out to the moms in my playgroup who have "dated" me and my children. Thanks for sticking around these past few years because I really don't want to go back into that "dating pool". Cheers to us for finding each other and making it this far into motherhood...
...and for those of who haven't found their mom tribe, it's not too late! I highly encourage going to play dates or social events; you'll find yourself meeting others who are pretty much doing that same daily mom life. I'll guarantee that you'll find that next "date" to go on.
1. An ad, how clever! Why didn't I think of that?
2. BFFs that suffer from word vomit? Sign me up!
4. So very accurate.
5. Seriously, why didn't I put out an ad?